8 Things You Don’t Want To Hear From Your Pilot While Flying!

Travel humor for you?

Get your laughs with Funny Taiwan! I created this new blog category (a topic) to gather all (hilarious) travel-related jokes in TaipeiDreams!

Let’s start with the plane, the flights that get us to and from our destination. Be it a budget airline, or a full-service one, you really would not want to hear these..

8 things you don’t want to hear from your pilot while flying!

1. This is your captain speaking.. I just want to remind you that your seat cushions can also be used as flotation devices. Please pay attention as our friendly attendants will now demonstrate how..

2. This is your captain speaking.. We are going to play a little geography game. Be the first 3 persons to recognize where we are, tell your flight attendant and win a tasty pack of roasted peanuts!

3. This is your captain speaking.. Uhhhhh….we have to go back.. We..uhh..forgot something..

4. This is your captain speaking.. All attendants look out the windows for that stupid goose. Report its position now as I have been trying to stay clear of it for the last 20 minutes!

5. This is your captain speaking.. Just for your entertainment, our in-flight movies system is now showing the classic hits of all time – The Poseidon Adventure, The Towering Inferno, and Airport 1975! Take your pick!

6. This is your captain speaking.. This stupid plane is so different from the ships I’m used to.. You will have to give me some leeway.. Thank you for your patience and understanding.

7. Hey (name of co-pilot), stop that! It’s ticklish! Heehee..not there, no! Stop that..haha.. Stop playing around! Oh shoo! The PA system is on!

8. This is your captain speaking.. I just want to share a joke.. Have you heard the one about 8 things you don’t want to hear from your pilot while flying?..

And 1 more please..

Bonus #9.
This is your captain speaking.. Welcome onboard! Is this your first time flying in our airplane? It’s my first time here too!